I Love That You Watched 'The Bear' but Here's What You Still Need to Understand About Working in Restaurants

Hulu and FX first released The Bear on June 23, 2022 and I’ve been thinking about it for 412 days straight, as of this writing. I watched it because it was required viewing for anyone who’s ever made their living working in a restaurant. The show felt more real than scripted, like a documentary. It seemed personal, like it was made just for those of us who live in that world. Other viewers latched on and it became a massive hit. I love that so many people are invested in a TV show centered on the restaurant industry, but they can’t just watch 18 episodes of The Bear and then start saying “Yes, chef!” and “Corner!” all the time. Those aren’t catch phrases. It’s not Steve Urkel saying “Did I do that?” or Joey Tribbiani asking “How you doin’?” Those are real things restaurant people say and you need to understand how truthful The Bear is.

You can watch the series over and over again (and you should before you read the rest of this because there are spoilers), but unless you have worked in a kitchen you will never fully understand the terror that sous chef Sydney felt in a season one episode when she forgot to turn off the pre-order option for online service and the orders started pouring in. That dread is way deeper than any deep fryer and when she walked out of the kitchen during the middle of that hellacious shift, it reminded me of the time I walked out of a Bennigan’s in Houston, Texas. The stress is real. 

Like her, I eventually crawled back to my apron because the restaurant industry is in my DNA. It’s part of me, just like the smell of old ketchup. Non-restaurant workers can turn off the TV after the final episode and wait six or nine months for the new season, only thinking about restaurants when they’re looking at a menu. The rest of us will continue to hear the relentless whirring of a printer furiously spitting out an endless stream of tickets, praying for the power to go off or for the printer to run out of paper. 

To some, The Bear is one of the shows on their My Stuff list, but for those of us who work or worked in restaurants, it’s our reality. We’re surrounded by it just like head chef Carmy when he was stuck in the walk-in cooler at the end of season two. At first, he felt trapped and then he let the situation wash over him and he found a sense of peace. Many of us have stepped into the cool air of a walk-in to escape the scorching drama of the kitchen, wishing the handle would snap off leaving us stuck inside. Carmy got what we often hope for and only a restaurant person would ever understand the significance of seeing him trapped in the walk-in.

Season two's “Forks” episode was the clearest representation I’ve ever seen of why so many people devote their life and career to restaurant work. It’s as corny as succotash, but some of us enjoy making other people happy. When the irascible Richie watches from BOH (sorry, BOH stands for “back of house,” or the kitchen) in the world-class restaurant where he's staging (that's basically an internship at a restaurant) and sees the joy of a couple celebrating their anniversary and realizing the check has been paid for — that’s why we do it. Service is more than food. What started out for Richie as a banal exercise of polishing forks grew into an understanding that one small moment or gesture can make a customer’s meal an unforgettable one. That spark of realization can get us through some long, hard shifts. 

I spent years serving breakfast to New York City tourists in a Marriott Hotel and I tried to put myself in their NYC-inappropriate shoes every morning. This was one breakfast of only a few during their big vacation and I wanted to make it as perfect as it could be. OK, I never ran five blocks to buy a customer an iconic NYC food like Richie did to surprise someone with Chicago-style deep dish pizza, but we already served Junior’s Cheesecake so I didn’t have to do that. I did, however, try to make their morning as special as possible and when someone would ask to take a picture with me on their last day at the hotel, I felt like I must have done something right. Only someone in the restaurant industry will understand that.

I enjoy Abbot Elementary very much, but I suspect there are elementary school teachers who relate to it more than I do. People who work in cubicles probably understand The Office more than me. Some people have Law & Order and others have Grey’s Anatomy. Watching a TV show about your own industry is the equivalent of having a secret handshake. Plenty of people can like a TV show, but someone who shares those same experiences is probably going to like it more. You can absolutely love The Bear, but unless you’ve toiled in a restaurant, you’ll never learn the secret handshake. 

Eat "The Bear" With These Recipes

'The Bear' Chocolate Cake

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Boursin Omelet

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Cola-Braised Short Ribs with Risotto

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